Winning With Your Words

Stop talking yourself out of victory

James 3:2–12 (ESV)

2 For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body.


  1. Those Loose lips Are DIRECTing your life

3 If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. 4 Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. 5 So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. 

A “BIT” of knowledge 

  • Your tongue is setting the direction to your life
  • Your words carry power to turn you towards or away from the things of God!

Where has your tongue been directing you?

  1. Those Loose lips are DESTROYING your life

How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! 6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. 7 For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. 


  • Gossip
  • Lies
  • False Testimony
  • Libel/Slander/Defamation
  • Flirting
  • Threats
  • Yelling
  • False Teaching
  • Flattering
  • Cursing
  • Unholy Oaths
  • Name-Calling
  • Excusing

What percentage of your words are negative?

  1. Those Loose lips are DEFILING  your life

9 With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. 10 From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. 11 Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.

Our mouth is either pure or polluted… it can’t flow with both! 

Where are the polluted places in your life?  Invite the Holy Spirit to come “reign” in that area.


2 For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body.

  1. Will invite heaven and evict hell

13 Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. 14 But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth.

15 This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. 16 For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.


What atmosphere are you cultivating around you?

  1. Will instill calm or invoke conflict

17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. 18 And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

A Bridled tongue is :

  • Pure
  • Peaceable
  • Gentle
  • Open To Reason
  • Full Of Mercy
  • Good Fruits 
  • Impartial
  • Sincere 

James finishes by letting us know that the reward of bridling our tongue is a life of righteousness lived in an atmosphere of peace

Matt 11:28-30 “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”